So we’re all sitting down to dinner when the following conversation leaves me quite speechless. My middle child, E, has a smudge of some sort on her forehead.
Oldest, K: (to E) You look like you just got back from church with your ashes.
Son, B: I was going to quote Shakespeare, but I decided not to.
We pay no attention to this and generally agree that yes, E has a smudge on her forehead.
B, excusing himself from the table to get something: God gave you one face and you make yourself another.
Me: …
B: ???
Me: Where did you get THAT?
B: I know Shakespeare.
K & E : Is that not Shakespeare?
Me: No, it totally is, I just didn’t think any of you would have known that quote. In all these years I can’t remember it ever coming up. Now who wants to guess which play?
E: Comedy of Errors.
Me: You have 37 more guesses.
K: Let’s think this through. Macbeth.
Me: Also nope.
Mrs. Geek: Hamlet.
Me: When in doubt always guess Hamlet.
K: Is that right?
Me: Yup, it’s from Hamlet. When Hamlet is yelling at Ophelia.
B: Right before he smothers her with a pillow.
Me: Oh, so close.