Shakespeare’s New Year’s Resolutions (Guest Post)

Bardfilm has discovered a list of Shakespeare’s resolutions for the New Year (with additions and expansions by Shakespeare Geek himself). Enjoy this rare find!

Shakespeare’s New Year’s Resolutions

  1. Stop casting Jack Lemmon, Bill Murray, and other comic characters in serious roles.
  2. More bears and bear-baiting references. Maybe actually have someone pursued by a bear?
  3. Lose ten pounds. Then earn it back again with a land transaction in Stratford, lol.
  4. Resolve Ophelia question—did she take her own life? Was she or was she not responsible for her own actions? Thought I’d made that clear, but audience reaction poor.
  5. Look for opportunities for sequels. Audience seems to love those. Maybe Richard III, Part II or Henry IV, Part II (Part II)?
  6. More sonnets to Anne; fewer sonnets (none?—Nah, let’s not go that far) to You Know Who.
  7. No more drinking parties with Ben and the boys. Might catch a fever and die one of these days if I don’t knock that out.
  8. Donate that second best bed to charity so Anne will stop nagging me to get rid of it.
  9. Consider starting New Year earlier—January 1?—will help scholars avoid confusion in future.
  10. Stop letting the Earl of Oxford try to take credit for work that is clearly not his own.

Our thanks for this guest post to kj, the author of Bardfilm. Bardfilm is a blog that comments on films, plays, and other matters related to Shakespeare.

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