Hey Baby, Want To Bump Euphemisms?

After her boyfriend used the expression “bumping uglies,” a Twitter follower asked me if our dear Bard had any better euphemisms for…well, bumping uglies.  I put the word out an suggestions started rolling in. I thought it might be fun to collect them here for future reference. Feel free to add ones that we missed!

And hey, let’s try to keep it PG-13, I’ve got kids reading.

  • “Making the beast with two backs.”  Technically a Bible one, I believe, but Iago borrows it.
  • “Tupping,” as in, “that old black ram is tupping your white ewe.”  Iago again.  It sounds more pleasant if you just say “tupping.” 😉
  • “Country matters,” Hamlet’s famous line. Personally I always assumed that this referred to … ummm …an entirely different act.
  • “Groping for trout in a peculiar river.”  I honestly had to look this one up.
  • “Dallying puppets,” anyone?
  • “Raise a spirit in his mistress’ circle.”  Once that one was pointed out to me I realize that it’s just filthy.
  • “It’ll cost you a groaning.”

What else you got? Anybody got one that actually sounds nice, and not like it comes with a nudge nudge and a wink wink and a “Know what I mean?”

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One thought on “Hey Baby, Want To Bump Euphemisms?


    Why, is not this better now than groaning for love?
    now art thou sociable, now art thou Romeo; now art
    thou what thou art, by art as well as by nature:
    for this drivelling love is like a great natural,
    that runs lolling up and down to hide his bauble in a hole.


    Stop there, stop there.


    Thou desirest me to stop in my tale against the hair.


    Thou wouldst else have made thy tale large.


    O, thou art deceived; I would have made it short:
    for I was come to the whole depth of my tale; and
    meant, indeed, to occupy the argument no longer.

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