Here’s a random thought that came to me while waiting for my wife’s car at the shop (yes, again – don’t buy a VW Routan.)

Of the few things we know about old King Hamlet, we know that he fought Old Fortinbras in honorable one-on-one combat.  True?

Claudius, on the other hand, is a sneaky backstabber who poisons King Hamlet in his sleep, and then later not only tries to pawn off his dirty work on England, but when that fails, he manipulates Laertes into doing it.  Claudius isn’t much for facing his enemies.

So, then, where does Hamlet fall on that family tree?

Thinking Claudius to be behind the arras, he doesn’t exactly say “Come out and face me,” now does he? He blindly runs him through and hopes for the best.

Then, later? When he finds out about Rosencrantz and Guildenstern’s secret mission to have him killed (a mission they didn’t even know about), does he do them in? Nope – a little trickier with the note and he, too, lets England do his dirty work.

It is only in his final rage (panic?) that he murders Claudius in front of everybody.  An unarmed Claudius, mind you.  Granted, Claudius didn’t exactly deserve a fair fight after everything he did, but still. You’d like to think that the good guy at least attempts to win a fair fight (I’m thinking Romeo/Tybalt – Romeo didn’t sneak up on him, he came straight at him).

Kind of makes you wonder whether Hamlet’s more like his dad’s brother, than his dad.

“It’s a long way down the line,” but director Ralph Fiennes wouldn’t mind following up his Coriolanus with a shot at Antony and Cleopatra.

I hope that his Coriolanus does well, and that this represents a new trend in Shakespeare movies – away from our yearly versions of Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet and Macbeth, and starting to show more love toward these other great plays that, really, are as good as lost to a modern audience. 

What plays would you love to see on Fiennes’ list?  I’d love to see him do something with the histories, ala Welles’ Chimes at Midnight. Not that exact story, but that idea — tell a large chunk of the history plays while at the same time telling your own story.

I’ve also heard praise for Timon of Athens, so I’m waiting for somebody to breathe some life into that one as well.

So for the past couple of years I’ve been talking about Shakespeare Halloween costumes, but never pulled the trigger on any of them.  I don’t want to get some generic “Romeo” costume from a store, but I don’t want to do something that nobody other than you folks would recognize, either.  (Amusing trivia — google “Romeo costume”, “Hamlet costume” and “Shakespeare costume” and the *same* costumes will show up again and again.  Argh!)

This year I had Hamlet on my brain.  I figured, “Black pants, black shirt with at least some kind of Renaissancy thing going on.  Fencing sword.  Carry around a skull.  Done.”  Harder to find than it looks.  I didn’t want to look like Steve Jobs talking to a skull.  Too soon.

Then, today in the costume store, it hit me – instead of going as Hamlet, I could go as …. Yorick.

There it stood, one of those “scary court jester” costumes, with the checkerboard pattern (what is the name of that?), the funny hat with bells, and a skull for a face.  Perfectoroonie.

If I can swing it, I’m going to get a stuffed Piglet doll and velcro him to my shoulders.  Get it?  He hath borne me on his back a thousand times? Piglet as Hamlet?  That’s funny, like, a dozen different ways.

I’m torn on whether to give myself a name tag that reads “A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy”, or to actually carry around a copy of Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace.  I’m thinking the nametag, though, because a) I’d likely put the book down at some point, and b) I’ve never read that book so I wouldn’t want people to think I want to discuss it. 🙂

Bonus Achievement #1: Dress up like this as I go around trick or treating with my children.  Print up the entire speech, sign it ShakespeareGeek.com, and hand it out to anybody that says “Who are you supposed to be?”  Drive up some free publicity, *and* appreciation of Shakespeare.

Bonus Achievement #2:  My wife’s already decided to break out her old “Renaissance maiden” costume from a previous Halloween, which if I’d pulled off Romeo, I was going to call Juliet.  But I’m thinking if I can convince her to carry a basket of weeds and maybe stick some seaweed in her hair we can call her Ophelia.  Nobody but me would appreciate the awesomeness of dead Ophelia and dead Yorick as a couple, but I’ll see what I can arrange.

I will take and post pictures of the final result!

EDIT : If I can’t figure out a way to make Piglet stay on my shoulders, I shall print out a big 8×10 of David Tennant (or Kenneth Branagh or Mel Gibson or Laurence Olivier…) and tape him to my back.  Same idea. 🙂